Monday, August 20, 2012

CONSIDERING OTHERS!

It’s human nature to be selfish. We never do things unless we are gaining something from it.It doesn’t have to be material. It can be self respect, acceptance or love. We even make friends with people we gain something from and make us feel good about ourselves. We all have the ME complex.  If the me complex is excessive we say the person is Egocentric. Well, we all are selfish so let’s not delude ourselves.  Ok! Let me not generalize; Mother Teresa wasn’t like that.   I’m not trying to divert from my topic but do you know that some people who give and run charity organizations sometimes do it for what they get out of it? They get fulfilment, acceptance, and recognition from the society and love. We never do things without looking at how it will affect us.

The world will be a better place if we all learn to think about how what we do affects others. If we put aside that basic human instinct and be considerate the world would be at peace. You can say consideration is acceptance and sensitivity. It’s part of the golden rule ‘Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.’ We’ve all met clods and inconsiderate people at one time or the other, maybe we were that person.
Let me tell you a story to make the term ‘considerate ‘clearer. I heard this story from a beautiful lady at the Lagos Finishing School and it goes,
 A Nigerian man is throwing a party in the UK. He buys twenty escargots(SNAILS) that is the same number with those coming for the party. Escargots are really expensive in the UK. It’s a treat over there. The party starts and it’s a buffet. There’s also chicken and fish in the buffet alongside the escargots.  Everyone is delighted to see the Escargots and they are salivating. The first man on the queue thinks to himself, ‘It has been a long time I had escargots. I will take four.’ He goes forward and takes the four. Other party invitees realising what he did start to grumble. In the end three people didn’t partake in the Escargot. Everywhere this man was seen after that day, people who were at the party remember him for that deed.
Referring back to the story, if that man had considered others, he would have taken just one escargot. The thought of ourselves indirectly makes us selfish and greedy but sometimes we have to consider. It’s a social skill as well. It’s very important we learn it. Do you know some things that would end if we all learnt to be considerate? I could tell you a few.
·    Corrupt leaders who go into power and grab all the money meant for a country and store it in their Swiss accounts would be no more. If they learnt to be considerate, they’d remember that the money is not theirs and is meant to serve the people. They’d use it for the purpose it was truly meant for.
·    There wouldn’t be wars. People who start them and partake in them would consider the lives that would be lost and the impact on others.
·    There wouldn’t be racism. We’d consider that if I see this person that is white as inferior to me, how would he see me that am black and vice versa. Like I said being considerate is very much synonymous to acceptance.
·    Religious discrimination would be on the low. We’d be considerate about others’ religion as they would of ours.
·    Heart break would be a thing of the past. Before we enter that relationship for selfish reasons like money, sex, connection or status and all that. We’d be able to look at the person as a human being and think ‘ if I were this person, how would I feel?’ then we’d be truthful with them and not enter into the relationship so as not to hurt them. Divorces would also be minimal with consideration, people won’t enter marriages for wrong reasons because they will consider their partners feelings and also the feelings of the children the union would produce.
·    People won’t use each other. The feeling of being used, deceived, betrayed wouldn’t exist as it does now.  We’d think before we use people ‘what if it was done to me?’
·    Gluttony would disappear and with it Obesity. When people consider how many hungry people in the world need the food the consume alone, if they consider what the consumption would do to their body like the diseases associated to Obesity and also consider what getting that disease would do to their loved ones then your guess is as good as mine.
·    Rapists and serial killers will cease to exist. If they consider the impact of their actions on their victims and their families and pause to put themselves in their victims’ shoes, they wouldn’t do it.

I can think of a lot more but you get the general idea. Considering others doesn’t mean you should be weak or a sap or think you are inferior and others are better. It just means be sensitive to others and how your actions would affect them. It takes a lot of strong will, character and discipline to be a considerate person. It’s doing something because you know you chose to, you controlled yourself not to. People might laugh and call you weak for not acting like them or the way they expected you to but you are stronger. Look at it like a Tiger seeing a man he could pounce on easily but decides not to do it and walks away from the man.
How then can we implant this seed of considering others? It starts with us, with our minds. It can also be taught in schools as part of moral education, counselling or whatever they call it these days but in a truthful manner. Teach the kids in your homes, neighbourhoods and let your neighbours and friends learn from you. Most countries don’t need superman; all they need are considerate leaders. Don’t forget Consideration walks with sensitivity and acceptance. HAPPY EID-FITRI to Muslims all over the world! Cheers!

3 comments:

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  2. This is S̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡ true.I pray dat God ll give us d grace to think of how our actions affect others.Amen.keep Ȋ̝̊̅† up Lady.cant wait for ur next write up.well done.more power to Ųя elbow

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  3. Hello Anonymous! you are right if only we could think about it first. thank you for the encouragement. I appreciate. You could follow the blog directly you know and be updated about posts, just click on the 'join this site ' tab on the top right side of the blog. Cheers!

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