Showing posts with label goodluck ebele jonathan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goodluck ebele jonathan. Show all posts

Saturday, January 3, 2015

THE CARPETBAGGERS ARE HERE!!!

THE CARPETBAGGERS ARE HERE!

(Hehehehe at the picture. Wrote this during the 2011 presidential elections. It struck a chord in me, elections are in February, so here it is, four years after and still true.)

   Guess what song is playing in my head? A song by Fela on suffering and smiling, oops! Wait the song has changed to Jayz’s ‘roc boys.’
Today is the day. What day is that you may ask? Nigeria’s presidential elections. Am I going to vote? No! Why? I have been disenfranchised. I will get to that part of the story.

   The first time I became aware of my country’s politicking ways was at the age of five. It was 1993, I was in school singing ‘jack and Jill went up the hill...’ we never finished that rhyme because like a swarm of bees, parents came to pick their wards. It was morning and I was surprised. Our teachers started leaving too. My friends were all gone. My elder brother came to drag me from class until our driver arrived. Everywhere, people were in a frenzy, shops were locking up, businesses closing down. There were riots. On the windscreen of each car were green leaves, I still wonder what that symbolised. The radio was on and a funny voice that had problems with letters like ‘F’ and 'P' came on. All I heard was ‘Coup’. As we drove home, people were protesting on the streets, soldiers were there to kill it or them. Cars were damaged, I saw people getting beat up. Lagos was in a windstorm. We got home I heard dad saying over the phone
“the election has been annulled. Military has taken over. Everywhere is in chaos”
CNN was covering it with their usual attention to details they give to other countries not theirs. The next day we left for our village till things quelled down. Thus started the reign of General Abacha, a name I got to hear frequently until the day he died, I was still in elementary school. You should have been there to see the jubilation; people were buying drinks for neighbours and friends. I sat in front of the television, watching CNN. Hey, I have always loved to be in the know learnt that from my dad. I was watching the TV with dad. That day, I heard different stories from different sources; news stations, newspapers, neighbours, family on how he died. Some said he died of a poisoned apple brought in by two beautiful ladies, some heart attack, others assassinated by the leaders of the developed world. All rejoiced that the man called tyrant was dead. His VP took over until....

   ‘Democracy is here’ was the slogan for the 1999 election. The military was handing over and the people were happy. According to them, the military was the root of the nation’s problems. Everyone was happy that civilian rule was back and the people were rid of tyrants. I remained indifferent to it all. Then a man won the election. I heard different stories on that too; he was just released from prison. Some powerful men went to meet him in prison and persuaded him to come out as president. I was amazed at the rags to riches story until I discovered he was a former military president before my birth. I pondered again ‘They say the military is the problem, why bring in a military man under civilian clothes. Once a pig always a pig, so, once a military man always a military man.’  I never really witnessed military rule but His I believe is the definition. His witch hunters tagged a crime commission and other means created by him hunted all opponents. People watched their steps and words. The people groaned
‘He is the problem of the nation.’
This was tyranny cloaked in democracy. He was the master of the game. With him came his infamous political party **People's Democratic party. Election came once more but he remained. The party was dragged to court over electoral misconducts but the judiciary I believe loved their lives so nothing happened. He plotted a third term but higher bodies, lol, warned him! It was killed.
   He got wiser the next elections.
‘If I can’t stay in power I shall put in my minion.’
First day I saw this minion on TV, I said to myself
‘This man looks like a sickler or someone with HIV.’
 Little did I know I was right in a distorted way, his reign was not his but that of another because he was ill. It became a game of chess and a puppet show.  Well, the man died, in came the VP. The north said no, thanks to zoning in Nigerian politics, which has become a turn-by-turn shenanigan of cowboys and Indians, lol!
   The VP was wise. He played on his name to build a brand. They say the name has brought him good luck from his elementary school days. He replaces others. He brings good luck to himself and bad luck to others. The political parties are singing
 'People’s party is the problem remove them and put us. We are better.’

   The brooms and umbrellas go for each other’s jugular. The witch hunter of the former umbrella president becomes the broom bearer. It is all ironical if you ask me. Pen is a former military ruler with a clergy as vice.The celebrities rally around for the umbrella's bad luck. They say they were not paid; they are doing it because they support him. Kick me in the butt because I think I am dreaming. One thing I have learnt about politics is nothing goes for nothing. Fine, they might not have been paid in currency but imagine if the umbrella succeeds at the polls and remains in power of course they will reap in benefits. I have learnt this rule from the age of five.

Here comes the question, who are the carpetbaggers?
 Carpetbaggers according to Wikipedia  ;In United States history, "carpetbaggers" was a pejorative term Southerners gave to Northerners (also referred to as Yankees) who moved to the South during the Reconstruction era, between 1865 and 1877.
The term referred to the observation that these newcomers tended to carry "carpet bags," a common form of luggage at the time (sturdy and made from recycled carpet). It was used as a derogatory term, suggesting opportunism and exploitation by the outsiders
   Ok, yes, I love the novel of same title. Who are the carpetbaggers in Nigeria? They are the politicians, the political parties. They are all the same; there is no saint amongst them. The military and the civilian, all same. Let them have the opportunity to enter as the umbrella did and they might do worse. As they sing, ‘a chair is still a chair, even if there is no one sitting there.’ Pot calling kettle black is the Nigerian political story. As I type, the usual is going on.  They all make promises. I know it is hard for someone to enter and not loot, fine, do it but also do some work. Let us feel the change then if we hear you looted we can say at least you made a change. Do not just loot and do no work. Rigging is going on everywhere. The truth behind my country is let the best man win. The best man here means the best rigger. The person with the best tactics wins, not the best man.
  Now, back to my disenfranchisement. I registered in Benin but I am in Lagos now, so I cannot vote. Who said I was not going to vote? I will but it will not be done personally by me, it shall be done for me. Check the database of voters,my name shall be there but how are they to know I am not the one that threw the ballot in. stupid is what I call the system. They are all opportunists and exploiters with sugar tongues and heavy pockets ,laden with stolen money.
Vote people, one-day e go better. If you vote, they cannot use your data for you.
Vote for me people. I am the best candidate . THE CARPETBAGGERS ARE HERE!!!!

And that's the end. The Nigerian Presidential elections are on the 14th of February, 2015, State is on the 28th of Feb. 2015. Will you vote? Where will you stand in your nation's history?
Be Pro-Nigerian!!! 

Saturday, December 13, 2014

THE LAND OF GERINIA!


Once upon a time, in a far away land called Gerinia, lived a great people. The land of Gerinia had comprised of different villages and clans before they were forced to come together under one name. Before they became one, they fought many wars amongst themselves. The land was blessed with milk and honey by the gods. Other villages saw this and wanted to steal it from Gerinia. They were conquered but later became free thanks to some of the noble villagers. The people’s eyes were now open thanks to the invasion. Formerly in the days of yore, they were contented with little, thanks to the merging of the villages and clans into one; they knew there was more available from the different villages. They wanted little no more.
They had to elect leaders for the new village. The leaders all wanted what the invaders wanted, to exploit the people, to take the milk and honey for themselves. Monsters, the lochness monster, goliaths, ruled the magical land. The villagers groaned and cried. They were suffering. They attributed their misery to members of a particular clan that had ruled them repeatedly.
In the village of Gerinia, lived a young man called Elebe. He was from one of the smallest clans. He was blessed with that name by a god. The name was to take fortune from others and give to this young man. He from the poor background and small clan excelled. He that never had shoes growing up. He that was laughed at by others. He understood the game. He seemed quiet and meek from the exterior. He wanted to get to the top. He joined the biggest men in the land. He ass kissed and obeyed. He always took over from others. He carried on until the highest position in the land was within his grasp. He had studied the people well. His name once again played in his favour. He got the town criers, the court jesters and the village drama group to sing his praises. The people listened. They thought to themselves. ‘This young man’s name has been good to him maybe he will bring that goodness to us.’
‘He is from the small clans and not the clan that has put us in so much misery.’
‘He is the saviour we have been waiting for.’
‘He is too good to pass up.’
‘This is the messiah of the people.’
They fought for him. They killed all the men that rose up against their messiah. They admired his gentility and soft speech. The village elders called the men vying for the leadership position to come and address them. Elebe did not go. Elebe might have had good intentions for the people but he lost it on the way. The people excused his absence. He won and became the leader. The people rejoiced with him. They relaxed and said to themselves, our sufferings are over.
Elebe lost his good intentions. The asses he kissed to get to where he was wanted more. He ran and got advisers. He listened to everything he was told and carried them out without questioning. He forgot the people that saw him as their messiah. He turned into the biggest lochness monster the village had ever known and seen. He let them suffer. He would tell them it was for their own good, to make the village bigger and greater. At first, they believed him but this monster grew in size every day. The people cried and killed themselves.
One day, they decided they had had enough when he passed a new heavy law on them. They picked up their hoes, pitchforks and set out to kill the monster named Elebe. Yes, Elebe had lost his good intentions, ambition had shattered it. The villagers decided to be their own messiahs. They fought for their freedom. The villagers of Gerinia looked for different means to vanquish the monster called Elebe but he refused to be vanquished. They decided to elect leaders who would lead them in the fight. One of the elected leaders was called Balour. Balour was a valiant soldier but he was a man. The people listened to him more. They placed all their trust in him. They showered him with praises and submitted all they had to him. Balour felt good. He had never tasted such power before. He thought about all the rubies he could garner from this. He gathered the people and they decided to stop work. No farmers would till the land, no anglers would fish, no palm wine tappers would tap, and the markets would be empty. That day, the villagers trooped out in their thousands. They marched the pathways and the streams. They sang the protest song in unison.
Elebe knew what the villagers wanted but he refused to give it to them. He had worked too hard to get to where he was. He was not going to let anyone ruin it for him. He sent his soldiers, the goblins after them. Some of the villagers were killed. His advisers told him not to worry, that hunger would send the people back home and to their vocations. It did not work, the protests increased. It went on for nigh a moon. Elebe ,called a secret meeting with Balour. He offered Balour rubies and diamonds. They cooked up a plan. He called for an open meeting with Balour, the whole town was aware of this. Balour and his men stormed out of the meeting. They told the villagers that Elebe was not serious. A second open meeting was called. Elebe reduced the law. Balour stormed out, that it was not enough. He told the villagers to stay in their houses. The people sang balour’s praises. Later that day, Balour called off the protest. The people of Gerinia were happy to return to work. They said Balour had tried his best. Balour and Elebe held another secret meeting. They rejoiced, their plan had worked. The people of Gerinia were happy. They had won. Have they??
Remember occupy Nigeria? (written January 18,2012)
Elections are coming; what will be your stand next year?