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Saturday, December 27, 2014

COMPETING WITH OTHERS

   
You left school, three years ago. Your mates are already serving and working, you look at them and you feel like a failure. You are working but you ran into a friend last week, she has a sweet ride, married, her husband is rich and she’s working in a great firm. You look at your life and decide it is rubbish. She’s leading a better life than you are. Your mates are all married and you are not, you look at them with envy and wonder why your life is cursed. You ask yourself what you did wrong, why can’t you be like them.
  Tonye was your junior in school but now he owns his own firm. He’s a big boy, a confirmed one. He has a house and cars, not rented. You walk into your one room and cry. Why is he successful while you are not? What have you done wrong?
  Every day we look at people and wonder why we don’t have what they have. We tell ourselves their lives are better than ours. We see the clothes, shoes, bags, houses, cars; spouses and we comment to ourselves that our lives are not worth it. We ask God, why does Stella have this and we don’t. That little envy appears each time we see their updates on Blackberry, Facebook, Twitter and other social media sites. Sometimes we even add, ‘I’m better than Tony.’ ‘I deserve all this and not her.’
  When we plan, we add ‘I’ll make it more than Tony has already.’ ‘My husband will be better and richer than Funmi’s.’
  Do you know you are in competition with no one but yourself? They are not competing with you. That Tony, Funmi, and Stella you are looking at and basing your life and your success with theirs are not you. You’re not them either. You have had different backgrounds, roads, opportunities, your dreams, desires are all totally different. You may have met Funmi’s husband and you wouldn’t want him because what you want in a man is different from what she wants.  Wherever they are now, you didn’t follow the same path they did. Maybe their family got them the job or they had a nest egg somewhere to start up or their field is in acting while yours is in banking. You are not same with anyone on this planet so why measure your success with theirs?
  Look at your dreams which you alone have and mark your progression and success. Yes, you might both be in banking together and he’s been promoted but you haven’t. He made different choices as they appeared before him. You might even be working in different banking firms or same but in different locales and with different bosses. Why worry your head over another man? Work on yourself and your dreams. You set your score mark for yourself. If you are in A now tell yourself you want to move and work towards getting to B next time. If your friend gets to C, remember you are not in his shoes and you don’t have same thought processes, opportunities and choices and keep moving on with your goals. Accept your life and the choices you’ve made, if you want more make it happen and not condemning your life by calling others better.

  Set your goals higher and move from where you are because you want to. Beat the score mark you had the last time. You are not in competition with me, him, her, them, and us but with you. Beat yourself! I know it's that time of the year when we evaluate achievements and milestones done in the year.

Thank you for reading! Hope my thought helps you somehow as it did me.

 Happy New Year in advance and good luck with your resolutions and plans. Cheers!

Saturday, December 13, 2014

THE LAND OF GERINIA!


Once upon a time, in a far away land called Gerinia, lived a great people. The land of Gerinia had comprised of different villages and clans before they were forced to come together under one name. Before they became one, they fought many wars amongst themselves. The land was blessed with milk and honey by the gods. Other villages saw this and wanted to steal it from Gerinia. They were conquered but later became free thanks to some of the noble villagers. The people’s eyes were now open thanks to the invasion. Formerly in the days of yore, they were contented with little, thanks to the merging of the villages and clans into one; they knew there was more available from the different villages. They wanted little no more.
They had to elect leaders for the new village. The leaders all wanted what the invaders wanted, to exploit the people, to take the milk and honey for themselves. Monsters, the lochness monster, goliaths, ruled the magical land. The villagers groaned and cried. They were suffering. They attributed their misery to members of a particular clan that had ruled them repeatedly.
In the village of Gerinia, lived a young man called Elebe. He was from one of the smallest clans. He was blessed with that name by a god. The name was to take fortune from others and give to this young man. He from the poor background and small clan excelled. He that never had shoes growing up. He that was laughed at by others. He understood the game. He seemed quiet and meek from the exterior. He wanted to get to the top. He joined the biggest men in the land. He ass kissed and obeyed. He always took over from others. He carried on until the highest position in the land was within his grasp. He had studied the people well. His name once again played in his favour. He got the town criers, the court jesters and the village drama group to sing his praises. The people listened. They thought to themselves. ‘This young man’s name has been good to him maybe he will bring that goodness to us.’
‘He is from the small clans and not the clan that has put us in so much misery.’
‘He is the saviour we have been waiting for.’
‘He is too good to pass up.’
‘This is the messiah of the people.’
They fought for him. They killed all the men that rose up against their messiah. They admired his gentility and soft speech. The village elders called the men vying for the leadership position to come and address them. Elebe did not go. Elebe might have had good intentions for the people but he lost it on the way. The people excused his absence. He won and became the leader. The people rejoiced with him. They relaxed and said to themselves, our sufferings are over.
Elebe lost his good intentions. The asses he kissed to get to where he was wanted more. He ran and got advisers. He listened to everything he was told and carried them out without questioning. He forgot the people that saw him as their messiah. He turned into the biggest lochness monster the village had ever known and seen. He let them suffer. He would tell them it was for their own good, to make the village bigger and greater. At first, they believed him but this monster grew in size every day. The people cried and killed themselves.
One day, they decided they had had enough when he passed a new heavy law on them. They picked up their hoes, pitchforks and set out to kill the monster named Elebe. Yes, Elebe had lost his good intentions, ambition had shattered it. The villagers decided to be their own messiahs. They fought for their freedom. The villagers of Gerinia looked for different means to vanquish the monster called Elebe but he refused to be vanquished. They decided to elect leaders who would lead them in the fight. One of the elected leaders was called Balour. Balour was a valiant soldier but he was a man. The people listened to him more. They placed all their trust in him. They showered him with praises and submitted all they had to him. Balour felt good. He had never tasted such power before. He thought about all the rubies he could garner from this. He gathered the people and they decided to stop work. No farmers would till the land, no anglers would fish, no palm wine tappers would tap, and the markets would be empty. That day, the villagers trooped out in their thousands. They marched the pathways and the streams. They sang the protest song in unison.
Elebe knew what the villagers wanted but he refused to give it to them. He had worked too hard to get to where he was. He was not going to let anyone ruin it for him. He sent his soldiers, the goblins after them. Some of the villagers were killed. His advisers told him not to worry, that hunger would send the people back home and to their vocations. It did not work, the protests increased. It went on for nigh a moon. Elebe ,called a secret meeting with Balour. He offered Balour rubies and diamonds. They cooked up a plan. He called for an open meeting with Balour, the whole town was aware of this. Balour and his men stormed out of the meeting. They told the villagers that Elebe was not serious. A second open meeting was called. Elebe reduced the law. Balour stormed out, that it was not enough. He told the villagers to stay in their houses. The people sang balour’s praises. Later that day, Balour called off the protest. The people of Gerinia were happy to return to work. They said Balour had tried his best. Balour and Elebe held another secret meeting. They rejoiced, their plan had worked. The people of Gerinia were happy. They had won. Have they??
Remember occupy Nigeria? (written January 18,2012)
Elections are coming; what will be your stand next year?

Saturday, December 6, 2014

REVELATIONS



(Welcome to the season of weddings)

 Do you believe in revelations? Do you take them as said or do you pray over them and hope for the best? Let me joggle your mind and give you some clarity.
  Anne and Bryan had been dating since their secondary school days. They were the perfect couple; best friends, lovers and all. People envied them, people admired them. They were the couple you looked at and wondered about what you had. Their relationship was in its tenth year. They were both done with school and working in very good firms. Bryan decided it was time to make her his legally on paper. He proposed and of course Anne accepted. Their families knew each other already, there wasn’t supposed to be any problem. Bryan’s mum decided to take him to her church for prayers before he took that big step. The pastor goes into ‘prayers’ says he has a revelation that Anne isn’t Bryan’s wife that his real wife is on the way. If he gets married to Anne he would never be successful in life and she wouldn’t bear him enough kids.  Bryan’s whole family turned on Anne when they heard. Bryan was forbidden to marry Anne, he was made to see reason and he gave up Anne. A perfect relationship died.
  Segun always attended church. He was a zealous member. There was this lady in church he admired. One day he decided to fast and pray so the Lord would reveal his future spouse to him in a dream. Guess whose face came up, this lady he admired. He went up to her and told her he had a revelation from God that she was his wife. She told him, she was engaged and didn’t get any revelation from God.
  Lola was tired of the single life; she was thirty and was scared her birds would soon be fried up. She met a great guy, Paul and they fell in love. Marriage bells were ringing for Lola. Paul loved her to bits. She followed a friend to a church  after her friend pleaded and she was told that Paul was a good man but Paul’s family was bad that she shouldn’t step into his family meaning she shouldn’t marry Paul. How was Lola going to step away after she had found love after searching for so long?
  Phyllis took her intended to her church and the pastor told her Uche wasn’t her husband that her husband was in the church.
  I could go on and on. I have heard a lot. I’m not trying to judge the power of revelations or shouldn’t I? How do these revelations come about? Are they based on prejudice and bias; maybe the person is not a church member or is from a different tribe? God gave us freewill. Isn't doing this like going to meet a fortune teller or diviner to cast lots for you? What happened to getting married to the person and letting God, lead you on your journey together, trusting in God? And if the revelation is true, doesn’t prayer conquer all, can’t you pray and the problem gets treated by God via prayers? They just say it and that’s it, what the hell happened to praying about it? How do you tell when God says this is the person’s soul mate? Does that really exist in quote? Or do we give these men of God so much power that they can say what they please and we believe it’s from God? What happened to praying after you get the revelation, I ask again?

  Asides my numerous questions, what do you really think about ‘revelations’?  Have you or someone you know ever experienced one? Do you believe these revelations? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the matter and would you let a revelation stop you? 

 Merry Christmas !

Friday, November 28, 2014

THAT SATURDAY AFTERNOON

                  
It was one of those hot Lagos Saturday afternoons. I was in a bus; I could feel the sweat trickling down my back. ‘I think this ozone layer thing is turning out to be a worldwide problem’ I grumbled irritated as I dabbed my face with my handkerchief. Beside me was an elderly woman of 50, dressed to the hilt for one of our famous Lagos owambe parties, which happened everywhere on Saturdays. We lagosians love our owambe parties. Her gele (headgear) was so huge I had to turn my head sideways to prevent it from entering my eyes in case the bus fell into a pot hole. I tried hard not to stare at her because her makeup was like that of an Adanma masquerade. I wondered who let her out of the house, old mama youngy.
My ass was beginning to ache. The seat on the bus was made of wood and the journey was long. I was on my way to Satellite Town to see or rather console a friend of mine who just had a bad break up. A guy she had been dating for four years just upped and left her. She had been crying on phone to me all morning so I  decided to pack an overnight bag and get over to her house before she did something stupid because a guy not worthy of her left her, I never liked Rafe. Therefore, there I was in a Mile 2 bus, travelling from one end of Lagos to another. I was busy looking out the window admiring the changes Governor Fashola had done to Lagos. I tried not to listen in on the conversation my fellow passengers were having when I heard it.
“Ah! Oga, wetin dey inside this bag?”
Immediately , I turned, the lady who spoke was in her twenties, very pretty and the man she addressed looked like a knock off version of 50cent with the fake diamond chain (bling bling) hanging round his neck and a baggy jeans. He tried to cover the girl's mouth, pleading with her
"Please, keep quiet” Naturally, my interest and that of every passenger on the bus was piqued. An old man sitting by the young lady asked her “My dear, what is your business with what he’s carrying?” She looked at him defiantly
“Papa, na my business o! A corner of the bag is open and I think, no! I am sure I saw dollars in the bag. What if the police stop this bus or worse the EFCC?” We all looked at him for confirmation. He said, “Please, I beg y’all, don’t turn me in. I’ll tell y’all the truth” “I been living in the states for years. I worked in the toilets, washed dishes, washed dead bodies and did all sorta menial jobs. I sent every penny I made home to my uncle to keep for me, then, I got deported man. So, off I go to me uncle’s to get my money and he starts telling me all sorta stories” he said in his knock off abi fake American accent, if you ask me. “He tells me I sent him no money,” he continued “One day, I wait till he goes off to work; I sneak into his place and find this bag of dollars, my money. Please understand” he finished. Some passengers were saying “ee yah!” “Thank God!” “People can be wicked, Olorun ma je (God forbid)!”  “Na wa o!” The rest led by the young lady screamed “ Driver stop this bus” “ I no wan go prison o” “ bros, even if na u get d moni, u steal am, u b thief” He kept on begging, then he said “ Please, don’t turn me in. I’m willing to share the money with all of you” Trust Nigerians, their eyes chook open “eeeh!” “Bros, u serious?”  “Ok!” “That’s better, for our trouble and silence.” My mind kept thinking and my heart was beating erratically. I wondered the kind of trouble I just landed myself. These people might be 419ers’, ritualists or even the famous one chance people. I kept quiet throughout the whole fiasco.
  We were heading towards the Oshodi expressway when the young lady said “Bros, Ur idea good sha but me, I will not collect stolen money. We have to bless that money” “I will not touch cursed money. I know a big man of God, a Pastor, he stays around Oshodi here.” She continued, “But he’s very expensive”
“Sister, that’s a very good idea,” the old woman beside me said. Warning bells were ringing in my head seriously. “So, young lady, like how much will it cost?”
“It’s very expensive o, like N500,000”
“Ah! That’s very expensive, is he buying a new car”
Everybody in the bus was complaining until the old man said, “I have a solution. Let’s all contribute the little we have, a little drop of water makes a mighty ocean”
“Baba, that’s a very good idea” they agreed.
“Thanks y’all” the 50-cent knock off said.
“Ok! Everybody, How much do you have on you?” They started mentioning how much they had. Then they turned to me
“Sister, how much u get?”
I looked at them and said; “I don’t have any money on me” My mind was spinning. I knew I had to get off the bus. I remembered stories of people who had found themselves in the same situation. Some are raped; some lose all their money, some for rituals, some thrown off the bus. Men! Was I in big trouble. My eyes darted left and right, we were in a traffic jam.
“Driver, please I wan get down” I said. The young lady looked at me surprised,
“ Haba! Sister, u no won make moni? Just bring any amount you have”

 I was panicking
“Driver, I said I want to get down” the driver ignored me. They all tried to convince me on why I should join. Are they stupid? I thought. Do I look like a JJC, in Lagos? I knew they were 419 people. So, I said to them “Wait, u look me finish, waffi babe like me, I resemble Johnny just come for dis Lagos wey we dey so?” They looked at me mouth agape, before they could say Eko! I opened the door on the left and jumped down the bus, thanks to the go-slow. I ran to the other side of the road, without care. Cars were blasting their horns at me. I boarded a commercial bike straight to my friend’s house.  This Lagos is a land of opportunities but as Daddy Showkey sung, “shine your eyes well well” This is Lagos!

Friday, November 21, 2014

THE FINE SYNDROME



 There is a disease going around. It isn’t the Fine-Lubinsky syndrome. I’ve heard of this one, maybe you have or haven’t; it is called ‘the fine syndrome’. Stop looking at me lost and confused. Read on and find out.
  Have you ever met a super fine being? It may be a gentleman or a lady. They have the looks that society has accepted as being handsome or beautiful; they also have a great body (let’s leave the successful part out of it). Yeah, them! The fine breed of humans.
  They all have a syndrome called, I’m fine, I know it, fawn over me and give me whatever the heck I want from you.
  Imagine growing up as a little boy and all your mum’s friends, your sisters’ friends, aunts and everyone else ‘oohed’ and ‘aahed’ every time they saw you; they pampered you with gifts and gave you anything you asked for.  Even your teachers in school, let you slide just based on it, they fancied you over the other students.
  You become a teenager and the next people to ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ over you are the girls in your class, those above yours and those beneath yours.
‘Hey, every girl wants tall dark and handsome and I’m all that.’
  The girls that wouldn’t budge for other guys do for you. You ride on your fine looks. You steal kisses here and there, they give themselves up. You get attention from everywhere and anywhere you go. You even set all the girls and friends against each other but you get away. The attention is just everywhere, even when your eyes are closed, your market is still selling. I’m referring to the people that are fine and know that they are fine and not the people that are fine and don’t know it.
  Well, we’re all people of some sense; we can reverse the above and place a female fine person in the equation.
  There’s an upside to being fine, you get everything you want in favours from the opposite sex especially if you are male (female, the men will want to ‘chop’ you though you can get away with it). There’s a downside for you, the person on the opposite side, they receive but rarely give you. They are conceited beings. Remember as kids, they had to do nothing to receive attention from people, why does it have to change now? You end up joining the bandwagon that feed their attention whenever they need it and they don’t see the need to lift a finger. You call, they never call back. You send messages, they read and never reply, you give yourself over and over but they never give themselves, all they have to do is smile and be fine. That’s always the case, they treat you how they like and never give more than a second of their time, until they need you again probably for a favour or to fill up their attention receiving /adulation dosage.
  Do you know you can actually reverse this? It’s a simple psychological thing.  Someone’s used to getting something, don’t give it. The attention they are used to getting, ignore them. Don’t call nor text. You text once and they ignore it, lock up. They are used to people asking why they didn’t reply their messages or fighting for their attention, don’t ask. You want to stand out from the rest. Go the other way; they’d end up wondering why they can’t get it with you. You’d be the person who won’t tolerate their bullshit or give them a pass card just because they’re fine. Little by little, they’d end up seeking your attention and approval. You’ll catch their interest and they’d give you more attention. No matter how hard, you’re dying to give in, hear their voice, be good in their books and bask in the euphoria, they already have the whole world doing that, be the opposite and treat them as they’d treat you and others, like they don’t matter and only you do.

  Make the world a safer place and be the cure to someone’s fine syndrome today. Lol! Cheers! December is around the corner. (Did you fulfil that New Year resolution?)

Saturday, November 1, 2014

UNREQUITED LOVE



A mighty pain to love it is,
And ‘tis a pain that pain to miss,
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love ,but love in vain
· Abraham Cowley

That verse said it all. Unrequited love can be and is one of the most painful experiences ever. It can be worse than a break up. Unrequited love according to the Merriam Webster online dictionary ‘love not reciprocated or returned in kind.’ If you ask me, it is half love, a one-way love. There are two forms or more of it. You love the person, you are great friends, platonic ones but you can’t tell them because you don’t want to ruin a friendship or worse they have someone and don’t see you in that light. You love someone, you see every day, they don’t know you exist but you know they do, maybe you work in the same place, are in the same school but you’ve never met them, you pass each other every day. Then the last, which I describe as the worst because I went through it, you are dating someone in some form of relationship, you love him or her and you think they do same. Then, one day you discover it was all in your head and everything was a lie.
This feeling has nothing to do with sex. They are very strong and genuine; it turns out to be an obsession. It is more painful when you think you had someone then realised you did not. It makes you feel like the world’s greatest fool when you realise you were in love alone. There are certain symptoms of unrequited love,
· Making a fool of yourself.
· You daydream about this person a whole lot.
· You create unrealistic hopes and desires.
· Said partner does not take you out, it is an indoors thing. You meet no member of family, close friends or importantly the mom after a certain period.
· You guys go on and off in the relationship thanks to her or him. One minute you are a couple, next, you are in the friend zone and on it goes because they know you love them. They lead you on.
· They take from you physically, emotionally but never give.
· They always make excuses when you ask them to spend time with you.
· You do the reaching out and practically the whole work. they call on you when they need something in disguise maybe moral support, cash, booty call etc.
· You always make excuses for their behaviour, every time.
· There are certain things the person keeps from you. They do not care to really know you or reveal more of themselves. You are not best friends.

You feel you cannot live without them. Nature is funny, when you love someone who does not love you back; it creates an immense longing for him or her, neediness most times taken advantage of by leading you on or use to kick you in the groin. You look at them and you see all the good, you believe they love you within but do not know how to show it. They are different from their exterior. You believe one day, they will wake up, change and realise that they love you, then see you there. When you find out you were led on, you feel used but you still hope and try to show them that you are the one they have always wanted and waited for. Wake up! You are not.
If your love was not returned, then it was never meant to be. Yes, you feel like your heart has broken into a billion shards that it feels like a heart attack. Rejection does that to people. Things happen for a very good reason. Let me tell you one thing and you should believe me, you do not want to spend the rest of your life with someone who doesn’t love you, doesn’t see you, takes you for granted, doesn’t want to really know you, someone who will not share him or herself with you. You do not want to keep being a slave to love, holding on that they will see you someday. No one wants scraps. Do you? You deserve someone that sees you, loves to share and spend time with you. You deserve someone who loves you as much as you love them. You wonder how you will live without them. You just have to have them, even if it means you love them alone. You wonder why they could not love you. Sometimes, they just cannot i.e. if you guys are just friends; it is painful if they make you think they do when they do not. You feel rejected, angry, lost, humiliated but you still love them, you think there is nothing you can do. If you ask me, you are in self-denial and soaking in self-pity, an illusion. You can do something because in the end you will discover it was just an infatuation. Love is not love, if not reciprocated. In my next post, I will share ways to get over an unrequited love. If you have ever been in one. Do share with us by leaving comments. (To be continued)

Friday, October 10, 2014

HOW TO CHANGE PEOPLE

   Change they say is the only constant thing in life. Everything in life goes through a procedure or stages you pick the word you prefer. It is never static. Things move forward, backwards, up, down or sideways, it just has to move. A rock that is in a static position also goes through changes. It doesn’t have to stand up and run. Lol!  Look at the Evolution theory, you and I have come a long way from our Ape days. Let’s visit the Bible; Adam and Eve were naked, then they put on leaves, then the leaves made way for clothes in the time of their children. Then for a while women didn’t wear trousers but now they do and not just that we are reverting back to the Adam and Eve days. What more proof do you need to agree with me that change is constant?
   The right way to have phrased this thought is; ‘Change is the only constant thing in life when it has to do with things, time, fashion and non-humans.’ Change in humans is not constant.

Friday, September 19, 2014

BRING NIGERIA DOWN AND STOMP ON HER



Arise o compatriots, Nigeria’s call obey.....

They better scrap the national anthem because it has become a sham. No one is ready to obey any call or die for Nigeria and there’s no serving of the fatherland. This article is meant for you reading it right now,
 You say the problem with Nigeria is the leaders. You say the leaders are corrupt. Aren’t you? There are other forms of corruption asides bribery and embezzlement which they do. Didn’t you ever cheat in the exam hall? You passed the answers of the questions to your friend or got it from them or you entered with extra materials or you arranged with the invigilator or had someone else write for you, you are corrupt! You open your mouth and say ‘he is a Yoruba man’ or any other tribe that’s not yours and you give that job, contract to someone else you agree with. You say Hausa's are stupid, Igbo’s are greedy and like too much money, Yoruba’s are backstabbers, calabar people and dogs. You have said something about someone from another tribe or you refuse to have dealings with them and you say you are not corrupt? Forgetting that tribe is secondary and being Nigerian is primary. You also bring religion into the equation. You don’t give that job or render that help because he’s a Muslim or because she’s not from your Christian denomination. You are corrupt! Nigerians are corrupt and not just the leaders. Yeah, theirs is on a larger scale because now it’s our money. You are corrupt and you expect your leaders not to be? Did they fall from the sky? Didn’t they emerge from your community? If you are corrupt now and you get into power like them, do you think a miracle would happen and your old habits and self would die?
 Nigerians are just a bunch of unpatriotic people. If we have patriots in this country, they wouldn’t be up to five percent of the entire population. Are you on Facebook, twitter or you use a BB; I have a question for you? Have you ever put up on your DP or PM about the US 9/11? When those kids were shot in school in the US did you put it up and pray for them? When Obama got in as president, what was on your DP and PM? We are so concerned about happenings in other countries and not in our own country, we could care less. Have you ever put up a DP or Pm or status to remember the millions that died during the Nigerian civil war? There have been numerous massacres in Nigeria lately, have you changed your DP for that? There are refugees in your countries that have lost their homes thanks to BokoHaram and the flooding in the country, have you changed your DP or changed your status for that? Last year over fifty students between ages18-22 were killed in Yobe state while they slept, no one talked about it.  Let one thing happen in the US or some other country and you see people changing DPS. Yeah you put up the ALUU4 ish because the video and pictures were everywhere and you did the whole #bringbackourgirls ish weeks after it happened because the US and every country was pondering over it. (yeah call yourself patriotic).Everyone was talking about it and you didn’t want to be left out. Like we all don’t see that angry mob when we pass beating up someone and we do nothing. That’s the Nigerian thing, It’s none of your business, fold your hands and do nothing about it. We are not proactive about anything concerning the country. If you cannot be bothered about helping a fellow Nigerian nor going out of your way to help save a life or do something selfless asides from going to the motherless babies home and taking pictures to show people how awesome you are or doing some mundane charity walk with printed shirts and banners where you invite the press. If you cannot be a little bit selfless now as an individual that doesn’t wield too much authority , when you do get into a position of power, why would you go out of your way to help Nigerians you said you would help? It’s not in your nature to do that.                                                                                 Reason it, now you see why our leaders are selfish. It didn’t start from them getting in there; it started from where YOU are now. If you can’t be bothered about your country and are in love with other countries, when you get there you’d do worse than them; take away the money, send your kids to schools abroad, buy houses abroad, have a headache and fly out for medical treatment, get a private jet so you don’t have to go by road, give license to foreign companies to float death coffins in the air, turn your country into a dumping ground of substandard services and products etc. Character wasn’t built in a day.
 What have you done for Nigeria in your life and personal dealings with fellow Nigerians (not your tribe) lately? Nigerians sing praises of the US. Do you think the US magically came into existence? They were colonised by Great Britain too. Have you never heard of their declaration of Independence? They had selfless people fight. They also had their civil war. They didn’t leave their country to another instead of developing it. They didn’t vie for another country and sing we love those countries. They took what they had and worked on it for over a century and more. They stayed there. They were not running to escape to other countries and leave theirs behind like a lot of Nigerians are doing. Why not stay here and build this country? If you love the US so much, remember we are just 53 years old, soon to be 54, our life span isn’t up to theirs. Why not copy them and stay in your own country. Why not copy them and be patriotic, fight for this country that is waddling? Copy them and be proactive about your country. Be proactive about what is going on in the National Assembly and the bills that are being passed every time. Don’t you know you and I have the power to change a bill? These people represent us. What bill do you know was passed lately? Do you even care to know?
 You are a Nigerian? Let me guess the only time you celebrate that is on October 1st. You change your DP, Pm, Status and you wear green and white. Can you speak any of the three major languages? You speak English, English is the language of the US and Great Britain. Do you speak yours? It mustn’t be your tribal language. Can you speak any? Have you bothered to learn any Nigerian culture? Do you even eat native dishes when put before you? Not just your tribal one but from other tribes?
   Let me guess, you pray for Nigeria on that day, right? You ask God to help our country and all that shit. Haven’t you ever heard that heaven helps those who help themselves? Wait, you think God would jump down from his throne and the country would miraculously become like France, the Us, The UK, Dubai, HongKong, Malaysia and co? Please wake up from your lazy slumber. Why would God give you hands, legs and a brain to go with it? Why do you think there has been no change in the country after many years of that same prayer? It is terribly annoying when people pray and do nothing to change their situation. Or you think it’s one person, a single human being that would change the largest black population and one of the most populated countries in the world? You’ve got to be kidding and forgive yourself for sounding foolish. If you want a change in Nigeria, be proactive. It’s not by praying alone. It’s time for elections and you sit in your house. What prevents you and others from standing there in the voting centre and make sure things work accordingly? You don’t even come out to vote. So, why won’t your voter’s data be used to vote for someone when you won’t even use it. You want a change in this country and you are waiting for a miracle? You are just plain ridiculous. Don’t you get tired of the same thing? I am tired if you are not but one broom stick doesn’t a broom make.
 Please fold your hands some more and pray. Your unborn kids will come and meet the same things you have met. Even if we are not proactive for ourselves, let us be for our unborn generations. I don’t want my grandkids to come and meet the rubbish I have seen. Aren’t you tired? Don’t you want more? What exactly will you celebrate on October 1st; did you help in any way to save this country? I am tired of sitting in a dark room or listening to the sound of the generators in the dead of the night roaring like tamtams, I am tired of driving and having to do grand theft auto driving abi grand tourismo.
 Look at China today, they go to the US to study and then come back immediately to theirs. Yeah, some live outside but darn it, I’m tired of typing, my battery is about to die. We can make this country better. We can! The upstanding people leave hoodlums to get into the senate, house of Rep, State assemblies, executive positions and the rest because they are not interested in politics. Even if you are not, why not try for the sake of your children and their children. I don’t like politics but if it can help me make a change somehow, create a check and balance somewhere, I love it right now. There are things we can do to curtail their excesses even as civilians. We have the power. Why sit in your room and do nothing? Why aid and increase the corruption in this country with your dealings? Why hate people from other tribes?
 You are a Nigerian first. You are not Yoruba, Ibo or Hausa first. You are a Nigerian! What have you done to help your country lately? What have you done for your country asides sitting there and pray? Praying and changing your DP once every year  on October 1st won’t cut it. What have you done?       Elections are around the corner, go figure. Cheers! Be Pro-Nigeria!

Friday, August 22, 2014

Are you dating a REMORA or are you one????




 You just lost that guy/ girl you thought was the one. He broke your heart into a million pieces and treated you worse than garbage but you still held on till the end because when you first met him he was caring, attentive and flattered you till right about the time you gave up the cookie and WHAM! He changes. You call, text, make trips to his place, sing your love for him but he’s moved on. You sit down in tears dazed by what happened and in walks his friend. He dries your eyes and tells you, you deserve better. That his friend is great but he tried to warn you. He makes you smile and the tears dry up a bit. He listens to you vent and pour out your tears every time and then you begin to see this friend in a new light.  One day, he tells you he’s always had feelings for you but couldn’t say anything because you were dating his friend. Your eyes light up and you sing i lost the wrong one to get the right one. You start seeing each other , you also put out, ‘God bless you ma’am’ . The day you bring up going public and letting his friend know, he says ok. Time passes and nothing happens, it turns into, he can’t do this to his friend. Or he can’t get the images of his friend touching you out of his head. All his friends would talk about it and all that maybe you guys should just stay friends for now until the time is right. Oh don’t get me wrong, some do go public but the relationship always ends.
  It might even be in a reversal ie a girl who broke your heart and her friend swoops in to help you mend it. These people that swoop in are called in my book, a REMORA. Yes, i can hear your brain wheels turning. What is a remora, Frances?
  “A remora fish attaches itself to the belly of a shark. It travels everywhere the shark goes. It eats any parasites on the shark which helps keep the shark clean. It also eats any leftover food from the shark.”
So let me help you break it down further.
  The shark in this equation is that alpha male or female that is handsome, successful and full of themselves (they are sha good at something) and they know it, they can get any girl or guy.
  The remora is their best friend or friend who you see them with everywhere and basks in their shine. These are the shy, not visibly awesome enough friend of the shark ( who says they aren’t handsome but you know what i mean) They don’t have the balls to have you so they wait for their shark friend to have you first. They even help you fall into their friend’s trap because they know they’d be getting you later.

  Who’s the leftover? I’m sorry sugar, you are. Yes, YOU, don’t look behind, you are the shark’s remains. You are in a vulnerable and confused state. Your confidence and oomph has gone down a little, ok maybe a whole lot. *smile*. The shark has left you dazed and in this state you need comforting even from a tiny fish. In swoops the remora *soundtrack playing*
  What service does the remora offer to their shark friend you ask? Come on it is glaring already. They take you off their friend’s back. You don’t belittle yourself with many text messages and go after the shark with a knife or make his life hell as he enjoys his new meal. They also make you feel good about yourself and listen to you vent and cry, they offer you their handkerchief (for their selfish purposes, hehehehehe!). So, no angry, spiteful, crazy you goes after their shark. In return for their service, they have you, the juicy leftover on their plate.
P.S: The shark knows his remora friend had you or will do (they’ve been friends for years and you’re not his first kill.) He either has the shark’s blessings to enjoy his left over or the shark works with him so he can get leftovers later. The PERFECT symbiotic friendship.  A do me, i do you team.
  Guys and ladies, have you ever met one? Think long and hard. Aha! Yes he or she was one. You might even be seeing one now, you can thank me later for saving you the stress *winks*
  Oh and if you just read this and found out that you are a remora, email me for private counselling. How does it feel to be second place and not be a man or woman but enjoy what someone else has had? You need total psych evaluation sha, Mr. and Mrs. second fiddle. Well, on behalf of your sharks, thank you, you’ve done a great job and still are. Get out of their shade and man up; I trained you better than that. Lmao!
  Please feel free to drop your questions, comments and answers below. If you’re not sure you have a remora on your hands, share your story and let’s help you decipher. You think you might be a remora *eyes widen* and you’re not sure, hmmm, share let’s be the judge of that. Either ways, have a beautiful love filled life. Love yourself first and every other thing shall follow suit.

P.S it feels great writing this not inspirational article. *runs away* *comes back* I’m still here for thee. http://youtu.be/GCHxMX9WaNc

                                                            

Friday, August 15, 2014

B-ve trailer (short film)


  presents  , B-ve.




B-ve follows Ivie Okojie (9), a psychotic little boy tired of living in World War Three who is on a mission of love few days to his birthday, to save his mum from an abusive father that hates them both. Does he succeed or not?

A short film Written, Produced and Directed by debutante director and two-time Homevida award winner, Frances Okeke.
Cinematography by Tope Lawanson
With amazing actors like Paul Utomi, Divine Mesh -Masade as Ivie, Femi Amusan,Bukky Thomas,Peace Odiete, Sean Lawson and John Edeh. 

Click on the Video below to watch the trailer.





video

Couldn't view it? watch it on YouTube, 

http://youtu.be/GCHxMX9WaNc

You can like the Facebook page; www.facebook.com/bnegativefilm  .

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