UNGRATEFUL MUCH

   Are you grateful? I’m sure you’d tell me ‘yes I am. I wake up every morning and I thank my maker.’ Do you know sometimes our supposed prayers of thanksgiving can be born out of routine? We say the words but don’t really mean them. It’s like an automated response; we know we have to say it, so we do. Then most of us make a habit of not saying or really meaning that thank you unless something we’ve always wanted has been granted to us. Then you hear

Moving On

 ( This post was my third post ever. So, it is a blast from the past. I just had to bring it back. Enjoy and i hope it helps you.)
  Relationships are very binding. They can also be very tasking. They can make us and can break us. If your relationship is a good one, you grow, if it is bad it robs your self-esteem. Being in a relationship is same as growing a flower garden. You put your

Reputation and What do Others Think about You? ( THE CONCLUSION)

  Yes, what people say can serve as a safety check towards your relationship with them but it also serves as a poison that kills you slowly. You lose your individuality in it.
  How do you lose your individuality? You do what they do because you want acceptance even if you don’t agree with it. You do it every time. It becomes your pocket bible.  Have you ever stood before your mirror trying on a dress, you love it and feel so comfortable in it but you tell yourself "people will point at me when I walk down the road. They’d think the style is bizarre" then you pull the dress off for another.
 Let me give you another scenario. You have friends that love partying and staying out late. You enjoy staying home, curled up on your couch with a bowl of potato chips on your lap and watch a movie but you don’t. You keep going out with them every night because you don’t want them to judge you.

Reputation and what do others think about you?

  We’ve all heard the word ‘reputation’  .Maybe your parents flung it at you.
 "How can you want to marry a Hausa boy? Don’t you know I’m a pastor? Do you want to ruin my reputation and that of this family?"
"Please when you get to school, remember the family you are coming from. Do not engage in anything that will ruin the reputation of this family."
"How can you come out with a third class? You have just ruined my reputation, you useless boy. My friends’ children all made first class and second class uppers."
"Where are you going to dressed like that, do you want to ruin my reputation? What would our neighbours say if they saw you outside?"
"How can you take the last position in class every time? Why is my own child different? Don’t you see how well the Onabanjo’s son did and he is in your class?"
"You cannot be a musician in this house. It is over my dead body. You want people to say my son is useless

The Age factor!

          

  This is an old post but after a conversation with a friend I had to revisit it , modify it and put it up again.
   Age to me is a matter of numbers. In the past, the age of a man was regarded as the measure of that man. Too much emphasis was placed on being elder or younger. Even wills were written reflecting on age because the eldest takes over when the father dies. Is it meant to be that way? Is it not better to give the property to your child you know will carry your business to the next level? Nevertheless, the age factor comes in.
    Even in relationships, the age factor has always been an issue. You see a couple so in love but because the man is old enough to be the girl’s father, the parents refuse. The scenario is worse if the woman

CONSIDERING OTHERS!

It’s human nature to be selfish. We never do things unless we are gaining something from it.It doesn’t have to be material. It can be self respect, acceptance or love. We even make friends with people we gain something from and make us feel good about ourselves. We all have the ME complex.  If the me complex is excessive we say the person is Egocentric. Well, we all are selfish so let’s not delude ourselves.  Ok! Let me not generalize; Mother Teresa wasn’t like that.   I’m not trying to divert from my topic but do you know that some people who give and run charity organizations sometimes do it for what they get out of it? They get fulfilment, acceptance, and recognition from the society and love. We never do things without looking at how it will affect us.

TICK TOCK!

Tick tock , tick tock,
Tick tock, tick tock,
Mr Clock sang over and over again.
The second hand moved slowly, steady and sure,
The minute hand answered the call,
The hour hand bowed to the pressure.
I looked at them wondered how they understood time.
So, I bent down, looked in and spoke,
‘Hello Mr Clock’

NO YOU CAN'T!

No, you can’t! I am sure you have heard that a lot. We all have at one time or the other in our lives. Even if it was not addressed to you but to another. People use it a lot to dissuade others when they do not understand your idea, your dream. They tell you it is not possible. When you start to believe them then you lose the passion for that dream and once that is gone, it is gone.
The question is do we always have to follow the norm? Do I have to walk like you or dress the way you think I should dress?

TWO WRONGS.

   Two wrongs do not make a right, they say. However, why doesn’t it? The Bible says if someone slaps you one one cheek, you should turn the other cheek. But should you do that? What cowardice! It is human nature to take advantage of people. If I slap you, today and you do nothing about it. Tomorrow, what stops me from doing worse when I know, you will not do a thing? The latter is human reasoning and people not wanting to be seen as fools retaliate. If I retaliate, you should know that it is because of what you did and accept my retaliation but people do not get that. Let me share a story.
  There were two friends, Peter and Paul. Peter had

THE IMAGINATION

Our imagination is one of the greatest weapons ever. There is no man made machine that can surpass it. I know the things I imagine on a daily basis. The fact that every person on the planet earth has an active imagination different from

SAYING GOODBYE

Goodbye is one of the most hated words in any language. It brings tears to the eyes. Celine Dion got it right in her song ‘Goodbye’. We hate it but it is a natural phase in life. We say hello, so we must use its opposite and brother, goodbye.
It might be that a loved one passed. It might be that the one we love left us for another. It might be circumstances that

THE LIFE SERIES 2; CHIOMA

My name is Chioma. I am thirteen years old. I am pregnant. I was not promiscuous. I have had nowhere to stay. I roam the streets of the city and sleep wherever I find at night. During the day, I beg for alms and food. Today, I have made up my mind to keep the baby. It is not as if I have the money to remove it, I do not even know where they do it. I feel like my body has been invaded. These days, I feel so hungry but there is no food. Last night I slept in a broken down car, two men dragged me out and raped me. The pain is something I am used to, so I did not fight them at all. I have been raped repeatedly since I started roaming the streets. I was pregnant before I started living on the streets.
It started two years ago. I was in the village that Christmas. My parents are very poor. My father is a shoe repairer and my mother sells roasted plantain in the town, I have a brother. I was playing in the stream with my friends when my little brother came to call me. When I got home, there was a car parked in the compound. I had seen cars in the town but I had never seen one very closely. The car was very big. Inside our house, were a big man and a woman who had trousers on. My mother always told me that no respectable woman should wear trousers. Her breasts were very big. At eleven, I looked fifteen. All my friends were envious of me. They stared at me as I walked in. Papa said I would follow them to the big city of Lagos. I was delighted. I saw Lagos in the home videos and Amaka my friend has been there before. She came back with so many nice things and stories.
We set off for Lagos the next day. Mr and Mrs Okafor had no child of their own, they told me. The journey was exciting. They bought me everything that was sold on the road. I was so filled up and excited. They had told my father that I would go to a big school in the city. I was always first in my class. I could not wait to lead in the new city and make friends. I love mathematics and I wanted to be an engineer in future.
I started school and I loved it. The only thing was I had to wake up by four and clean the house, which was a duplex. I set the table for breakfast. Oga and madam leave for work before seven a.m. me; I get to school by seven thirty a.m. I walk to school. When I get home, I continue with the house chores. Oga comes home by eight pm. madam comes home very late. I do not know why. There was a day she came home by midnight. I have to be awake to open the door for her.
One day, I was in the bathroom when the doorbell rang. I tied my wrapper and rushed to open it. It was oga. As I took his briefcase, my wrapper loosened. I covered myself up immediately. I apologized and brought out his dinner. The next day, oga and I were at home alone. I was in my room reading, when my door opened and oga came in. He had a nylon bag in his hand. He gave it to me; it was filled with matching pants and bras. I thanked him, thinking he would leave but he stood there. He told me I should put them on, that he wanted to see it on me. I said I could not, he threatened me. I pulled my clothes; he was watching me with a look in his eyes. I tried the first pair and then he jumped on me. I was crying, begging and fighting him. He was on top of me and he was too heavy and strong. He tore the underwear. I can still remember his breath on my face. He squeezed and pinched my breasts, it was painful. I felt something, hot and long on my thigh. Then it entered me, it was so painful. I felt like I had been torn into two. He was moving on top me, with his hand over my mouth and he squeezed my breasts with the other. He made an animal sound and stood up. I could not move, the pain was too much for me. He threatened to deal with me if I ever told madam. He said madam would never believe me that the last girl had tried. He told me I would enjoy him. I cried throughout the night, I could not believe my virginity was gone without my consent. He came every night even during my period. On those days, he would make me put that thing in my mouth. It was so disgusting, that I vomited on him one day. He now bought me things every time. I was meant to be enjoying all this but I could not. I knew he was using me. There were times I wanted to tell madam but she was always absent. Months later, I noticed my period did not come. I was always tired. One day, madam took me to the hospital for a test. The doctor told her I was pregnant. She took me home that day and she and oga queried me on who was the father of the unborn child. I could not say anything because oga was threatening me with his eyes. She beat me and told me I was going back to the village, the next day. That night, I took my things and ran away. I have been on the streets for two weeks but it feels like two years. It is almost Christmas. There is joy and laughter everywhere but I cry. My life is over. My dreams of being an engineer are gone. This afternoon, I had met a woman from my village when I was begging for alms. I had told her what happened. She said, she and her family are leaving for the village tomorrow that I will follow them. We are in her car; she is taking me to her house. It would be nice to have a hot meal and sleep on a real bed. I would rather face the shame and disappointment from my parents than roam the dangerous streets. But really, how do I face them tomorrow?
This story is fictional. Be kind to that child that lives with you. She is human and is someone’s child. Treat them as if they ARE yours and not animals. HAPPY NEW YEAR WITH LOVE!